i’ve seen three geysers erupt
one in reykjavik, the backdrop a glacial terrain
another in Yellowstone, that faithful one
the third came from my mother’s gut
Devouring five bottles of malt duck and a bag of lay’s potato chips
with the godfather on a night of pouring rain in late October
On Friday’s I search
For your face in mirrors,
visiting bars soft lit by streams of
sapphire bulbs; by eight-o’clock
"I'll never drive on that road again," she said,
as if it was the road who killed him
with her tempting curves
and shimmery guardrail waistband.
Why is it wrong
To “take it to heart”
My heart is all I have
All that lives when I die
I dust off the bruises
On my knees,
because after all I did fall.
A story rattles
loudly in my backpack,
My feet have carried me for many miles
At times, quickly
At times, slowly
They have hurt and they have bled
And they carry me still
This body will weigh down by judgments.
The scars too will be mocked and questioned.
The flab will be disgusted and hated.
Cursing the periods, while thinking, you should’ve gone out or waited.
When I asked my dad if I could interview him about prison
we were on the couch in pajamas watching Law and Order: SVU
Staring at my body in the mirror is like waiting looking for answers from a dead man. The dead cannot speak, and my body cannot repair the brokenness inside me.
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“It looks nicer straight,” they said to me
with a grin on their face.
Because God had blessed us
With the rarity
That is the lack of humidity
On a Florida summer day.
I am getting better -
at waiting to be back, until
I can once
a g a i n
Call this body, my home.
Armor grows heavy,
It clangs too loud, chafes
the rounded parts of us.
When I look back on my past
I see shards of betrayal
Arrows of deception
Shot right through my heart
this woman unseamed and split
you have a responsibility to honor
you must honor her wounds
you must honor her capacity for creation
you must honor her will to destruct
this is a woman's heart unfolding
I write for the woman who swallows the small blue pill
who smiles outwardly, yet inside wars a battle that no one can see ..