A Lesson in Forgiveness I Have Yet to Learn

By. Michal Dyson

it’s hard to talk to mama sometimes
we both hold the pain
like a pretty cupcake but
with nasty icing

mama always bottled me
until she couldn’t, i grew
now, i bottle her
& only sometimes i feel guilt

i avoided writing me & mama down
for years
not even alone
not even in my head

it’s hard being certain of the words
to say, when there’s a lot

knowing you shouldn’t say anything
about everything
about the little things, & not so little

but it’s your mama they say
& it’s true
we have some great times

but she was my first love
& also the owner of the hand
that snapped me

in ways she’ll never understand
& we’ll both just have to keep on living
with that

because she isnt’t a bad mother
& i’m not a bad daughter

but there’s a lot in-between

My name is Michal Dyson (her/she) and I am a poet living in the Philly area. I recently earned an MFA in Creative Writing from Rosemont College and was the recipient of the school's MFA Alumni Award for showing exemplary knowledge in my specialty (poetry). I write poetry on subjects such as identity, femininity, race, coming-of-age, sexuality, and the black experience.
You can find Michal on IG @mynameismichal_