My Unedited Life: Podcast Interview With Golden Drake

*This is the transcription of our FWWR podcast interview. Subscribe to our itunes channel to tune in weekly!

Golden Drake:

Dude Society programmed me to think that if I don't fit the freaking rigid little box of mainstream beauty, that I'm quotation marks ugly. And here I am, I'm bald from Chemo, there's my double chin, there's my, my bloated body from chemo. There's my chest with two huge gashes across it and you know, bloody things from where the tubes were pulled out... I was like freaking beautiful. I am beautiful because just because I have a body and like that is a miracle.

megan febuary:

hey everybody, welcome to your for women who roar podcast, this is your host megan Febuary and I'm so excited to be here to share the wonderful authentic stories and poetry and art of women. And if this is your first time to the podcast, welcome, it's always a pleasure to have new listeners and we say this all the time, but when you are sharing your story, you are an advocate and if you are listening you are an advocate. So just by you being here plugging into the community, you are participating in a form of advocacy for women's voices and stories. So thank you so much. All right, we got some news for you. Our second print edition is currently in production and will be available as well in July, so you can preorder your copy now on the shop and on our website. So definitely go check it out. Reserve your copy. It's stunning. And if you have a shop or a store and you want to feature this magazine, then you can be our stockists. So yay. Just send us an email and we can give you all the information on how you can get signed up for that. All right, next up, our submission portal is open. So we are now taking submissions for the body issue on the topic of bodies. So definitely go ahead and send us all your beautiful poetry and writing and art for a chance to be featured on our online magazine and in our next print publication. We'd love to give you this opportunity to be heard and seen. Um, so go ahead and do that. We've also opened up a narrative prose, via MP3, so you can be featured reading your work on our podcast, which is super fun. And we are also taking video prose so you can submit video of you reading your work for our youtube channel. So Super Fun. So if you're not into like writing out your work, you can and you're more into the youtube and the video and the spoken word. This is your space. So definitely go ahead and submit that and we'd be so excited to see your work and your face and hear your voice. It's adds a whole another special element to it. All right, my friends, let's not delay anymore. Let's dive in to this amazing conversation with Golden Drake. So sit down, grab a pen, grab a cup of coffee, and just take a deep guy of cause. This is deep and it's beautiful and it's hard. And this conversation made me cry while we were having it, but also while I was editing this. So I hope it speaks to you as much as it spoke to me. Everybody welcomed here for women who are podcast. I am so excited to be here with the amazing golden Drake who you may know from the cover of our first issue. she has such an inspiration and I came across her feed at this past year and was so empowered and fired up by reading her vulnerable story, of survival and also how she just continues to press into her voice and power. So I'm so excited for you to meet her and to hear her voice for yourself. So hey Golden.

Golden Drake:

Hi Megan. Thank you so much for having me.

megan febuary:

You're so welcome. I'm so excited to have you on the show and to get to know you better and to hold space for you to share a bit of your story here. Stoked. Let's do this. Awesome. Awesome. Okay, so let's just start, um, by you sharing a little bit about yourself, you know, just a little bit about your background, um, what you think would be great for people to know about who you are and maybe something that might surprise people.

Golden Drake:

Okay. Um, well it's always interesting to give the identification description and maybe just to start off with surprising people. Um, I've always felt perplexed at playing the human game. And so that's kind of been an signature imprint of my life story is trying to figure out how to be a human because I see so many folks out there doing it so well, and I've always, since I was a kid, kind of scratched my head and been like, how do some people do this so well? Like I don't get it here. Nothing makes sense on this planet. And now as an adult, I kind of see that the framework of nothing makes sense is it's the society because nature has always resonated nature and the earth, um, has always made sense to me. But it's like how do you function in this paradigm, in this world, in this society that everything feels upside down, inside, out, backwards. It doesn't resonate. And so it's, it's always been quite an interesting challenge to figure out how to freaking human being every day. Um, so I identify first as source, having a human experience like everyone else. Um, and I am in a female body. I am a mother to two incredible human beings that I believe came into my life. I'm so honored that they chose me to be their mom. They came into my life and they put my feet on the ground and they really kind of helped me find my inner compass and helped me get more attached and connected to this reality of like, all right, I'm here, I'm doing this thing. And suddenly it was like, it wasn't about me at all anymore. It was about being in selfless service to ascended masters. so I've been a mom and I've been a single mom for almost all of their lives. I have an 18 year old and a daughter who's almost 16. And, um, I, I think I define myself as a creative, as an artist. You know, it sounds really pompous to say, like, the word mystic just showed up on my tongue and I'm like, who am I to say I'm a mystic? But I feel I'm a Pisces and I'm very much more comfortable in the creative dream, sort of fantasy, imagination realm. Um, I recently went through breast cancer and um, went through the horrors of the western medical modality, treatment of Chemo, radiation, um, bilateral mastectomy almost died a few times in there. Um, and I can honestly say that every single one of my most horrific experiences that I was blessed enough to survive have been the most precious gifts. Um, well not the most, but some of the most precious gifts I've been given. And so meeting with the spirit of death and look in the spirit of death in the eyes and being like, all right, who's game is it? Like, are you gonna win or is the life force within in this body going to win? And being brought to the brink of nearly losing my body or leaving my body brought me into the awakening of the preciousness of having a body and the, this impetus to really be my frickin self, my authentic self. Because I've spent a lifetime for a host of reasons. You know, like early child met a child attachment wounding and core wounds and all the things that happen in early childhood that sort of informed the way that we're going to navigate life imprinted upon me. That who I was in my authentic self just wasn't good enough to garner the unconditional love that I was longing for and that I need it. So I kind of played this game my whole life of being very adaptable, very mutable, showing up in the ways where I thought would make people more comfortable or you know, as like a covert agenda away to garner love, very sincere strategy to get that. Um, but when it was like my life was on the line, I went into this space of like, Holy Shit, dude, if it's going down, like if I'm gonna die soon, I, I need to first of all be myself fully and I need to love who I am fully. And, and so going into this process of like chemo and like the horrors of what that does to your body and mind and your spirit and your emotions and your mental health and losing your breasts. And it was just like trauma after trauma. I lost my dad the day before I was diagnosed. I lost my uncle during treatment. And so I lost my job during treatment. Like my life was coming and done. But it was just like all of these things, this disintegration of reality and in my life being blown to smithereens and my sense of reality being blown to smithereens, it was a gift because it brought me down into the essence of truly like who am I deeper than all the imprints that have been placed upon me by the world? Like who am I really and what am I, where did I come from and why am I here? And if I get to live, what happens next? You know? And if I don't get to live, what happens next? And how can I, you know, how can I really, truly Freakin love myself? So it's wild because cancer was sort of the crescendo of a life of a lot of struggles and hardships as a single mom. And you know, living in poverty for so long and just surviving amidst patriarchy, that's hard for any human being on this planet unless you're like in the 1%. Right. But it's just, it's been this journey as of late of, of awakening and feeling into the preciousness of simply having a body to experience this third dimension. And so I guess that's not a very succinct way to describe and give people a sense of who I am,

megan febuary:

That has definitely been my experience of you so far is as a honest embodied storyteller and I haven't even met you in person. So this is all through the strange world of social media. Um, that has become a really cool way for us to connect and feel connected, uh, you know, beyond the physical. Um, and from my experience of reading through your kind of online diary, I have been so inspired by, um, you're kind of just, just boldness to share your experience, your truth without apology. And I think it takes lifetimes to learn that kind of self acceptance and, and to unlearn patterns of resistance against our true self and that place of apology for who we are growing up. Um, I really relate to that and I think it's always, you know, a process of learning our voice and trusting that. You kind of spoke to this in our, in our interview, in the issue, um, and you've spoken to it on your social media platform about how you did create that kind of online journal to document your experience after you were diagnosed. Can you share about what, what prompted that for you and how has that served you as you've been going through this process and how it's maybe served others?

Golden Drake:

Awesome. Yes. Okay. So I think it all kind of started with, right after I was diagnosed, I had this thought of, it's like when you're diagnosed, you have to tell people or you know, some people don't tell people, but in my world I was like, I need people to know. I mean, I'm going to be going on this journey and I honestly don't know if I'm going to live to tell this tale, so I'm just gonna speak on it. So I made a video on youtube where I shared my diagnosis and I put it out there and I bought, you know, of course a flood of response from loved ones and people who were leaning in to give their love and prayers and offer support and whatnot. And along with that, I had created a go fund me and I put that video in there. And when I was diagnosed, uh, and I spoke to the specialists that were going to be treating me, the oncologist, surgeon, the radiologist, the piece about the surgery, um, and knowing that I was, you know, eventually I chose to have a bilateral mastectomy and I knew I was going to go flat and I started doing research online about, I wanted to see images and I wanted to hear stories of women who made that choice. Um, and I didn't find a whole lot, but the stuff that I did find was just like gems, you know, like I saw images of what kind of like images that would prepare me. Like, okay, this is gonna be my reality. And up until that point, I had never seen an image like that. Um, and you know, for whatever reason, I had never come across that, and it's not really normalized are out there and there are really hardcore advocates for going flat after mastectomy. But for whatever reason, they hadn't crossed my path until I sought them out. And, um, when I read some people's online journals or, and I saw him, a couple of people on Youtube who had documented it, it was so helpful for me that some of these people were writing and recording videos and documenting in real time in process. And I was just like, wow. For me, it was like someone threw me a lifeline. It was just like, wow, okay. Like this is helping me kind of find myself in my center in this horrific terrifying process I'm about to go through. And I just realized I started to share posts, writing pieces and photos on Instagram and Facebook and youtube about my process. And I got a lot of responses from people who were really intrigued in a lot of people magnetized in who were going through the cancer journey themselves. A lot of people who were just going through hardships in general or say their mom was going through it or their aunt had gone through it or whatever it was and you know, beneath it being a cancer journey. I think the subtext was also like, here I am just authentically documenting my life story online. And it just so happens that I'm going through like the gnarliest of Gnarly's and I'm not editing it. And I just sort of had this holy vow with myself where I was like, dude, you're not, you're not going to hold back and edit in life anymore. And so my art was this sort of like playground where I got to explore what it felt like to be completely unbridled, completely authentic. You know, like I video myself dancing in my living room or just slightly moving or what not. When I was going through chemo because I didn't get out of the house a lot because I felt so horrible and I'd share those dance videos online on. And then when my breasts removed, you know, I, I took f I had a friend, she snapped a photo of me in my surgeon's office when she had removed the bandages and she was pulling the tubes out of my chest, the drainage tubes. And I had my friend, you know, just snap a photo. And, and I sat with it for awhile cause I was like, Whoa, this image is gnarly. Like I never would have fathomed before breast cancer that I be posting a photo that on first glance I'm like, Whoa Dude, I look monstrous. I look like sidebar. I look, I don't look human there. I looked like something scary and then I just fell into this deep compassion.. Like, that's me and that's what's real and that's where I'm at. And then it brought me into a deeper contemplation of like, that's not a monster. That's fucking beautiful. My art and my sharing started to be this sort of like this medicine where I started to see myself through a lens of unconditional love and these words, unconditional beauty kept coming up for me when I would, you know, document this process was like, dude, society programmed me to think that if I don't fit the fricking rigid little box of mainstream beauty than I'm quotation marks ugly. And here I am, I'm bald from Chemo, there's my double chin, there's my, my bloated body from chemo. There's my chest with two huge gashes across it and you know, bloody things from where the tubes were pulled out. I was like, I'm freaking beautiful. I am beautiful. Because just because I have a body and like that is a miracle. And you know, it was like unpacking those constructs that even while I'm in a fight for my life, I'm still preoccupied with about how I look and if I share it, am I going to freak people out? And I was like, you know what? Fuck it. I'm posting this, I'm sharing it and I'm not just sharing it like, um, at to advocate for a flat because now I'm an advocate for folks to know that going flat is an option that you don't have potentially cancer causing implants in your body after cancer. Um, after your breasts removed. You could if you want, but flats and option. But I also wanted to be like, dude, fuck the fucking, the rigid patriarchal paradigm that shoved down our throats, our whole lives about what beauty is. And it was like sharing it with the world helped me face it myself for myself. Because when you look down for the first time, you see body parts missing, your brain doesn't compute it. No. And then when it's like a body part that's associated with your sexuality or my femininity or being a woman, um, it really, really fucks with your head. And you know, so it was like this many multi layered process of art as therapy, art as healing, art as advocacy, art as connection, art as inspiration, helping folks in the body, positivity, movement, helping myself, the body positivity movement. So many aspects. And for me it was like, it was a breath of fresh air to just be like, boom, this is me. And the fact that people were like, fuck yeah. And people would write to me and just be like, I'm so inspired by this. It's helping me in my own ways and not going through cancer, but I'm going through this other thing and you're helping me feel like it's okay and safe to dig deep in my well. It's my darkness. And, and to share it with myself or with loved ones or, or maybe I do feel safe and bold enough to share myself truly online instead of a glossy, photoshopped, edited version of myself, you know? It got to the point where I would receive DMs on Instagram more than one where people would say, wow, I was literally sitting here contemplating taking my own life. And it just so happened, I open Instagram, your thing pops up. It's the very post with the very words that I needed that actually caused me to not do that, to not take my life. So thank you. And I would just read out, it was like DM after DM of people who were just thanking me and it was like, it was such a blessing for me too because I was like, this isn't even about my ego. It's not even about pumping my ego up and thinking like, yeah, I'm helping all these people. It was like there is a divine illuminating essence that is moving through me that is reaching out from me and it's like, it's like my own ego is getting out of the way for the biggest deepest truth me to move through to share an energy and I call it, it's like an awakening energy where it's like there's this energy that lives within us and it is unconditional, infinite love and it's the truth of who we truly are and the world has all these really tactics to convince us otherwise. But something happens when you're in the presence of other people who are in this process of awakening into the truth of who they truly are, which is love. And it's like we helped stoke each other's fires the same way that happens when I see people in my life, in their ways being authentic and real and showing up at the risk of being seen as the crazy person or you know, being ostracized for just being themselves. Like you're the real hero. You know, it's like you being that helps me be that. And so then when I'm at, then I can help other people be that. And so I don't know if I answered it, I just kind of went on a tangent. Did that answer it?

megan febuary:

Yeah, you're good. So whenever you are sharing these really vulnerable stories, and you know, I've, I began to use my platform in the same way, sharing poetry and, uh, letting it be kind of a platform to share my different trauma stories, um, about sexual assault and survival. And when I began to do that, um, I had really wonderful responses as well. Um, but every once in a while I would get a response that was like, oh, you'll be okay. Or, you know, I don't know, something really optimistic, but it was also really invalidating. And I wasn't asking for someone to take care of me, you know, my voice and my openness and my putting it out. There was a form of advocacy for my experience. Have you had any experiences like that where someone kind of invalidated your experience through just trying to just pat you on the back and say, Oh, you know, you'll be okay or whatever. You know, something that kind of took away the power of your pain and your voice.

Golden Drake:

Oh yeah. And I know, you know, in being informed with other people who are dancing with cancer, um, this is a very, very common theme. And I think what it is is like we, as, as people is humanity. We're not taught the skills of dropping in and deeply presencing and witnessing someone else's pain without trying to fix it or bypass it. So first of all, we're not taught that skill set. Second of all, because we don't have the skills. And because it's so taboo to talk about deeply painful things because we don't want to inconvenience people. We don't want to burden people. We're not taught that this is an okay thing to do. Um, a lot of folks are, they're not resourced enough to their own disturbing pains that they can't hold space for anyone else's and they don't. They don't know how. Um, and so yeah, a lot of people give you the cheerful pick me up. Like you're going to be all right. You're gonna get through this, you're strong warrior. I mean, there was a lot of that and people mean well, it's sincere. You're tough. You're going to overcome this. And it's like, yeah, I know. But like right now I need you to sit with me in this. Like that's a lot of what I experienced was like, please just witness me and I don't need you to fix me. I don't need you to gloss over this with how strong I am. Cause right now becoming undone, I feel weak. I do know I'm strong, but I'm having a moment. And so what I've learned, um, in life is that one of the most precious gifts you could give someone when they're in their pain is to not bypass it with a, pick me up, cheer me up, and not to immediately go into fixing it. It's can you sit with me and witness my pain with me? Hold it in the container without attaching to it and letting it, you know, overwhelm or destroy you. You have to be resourced enough to do this work and it's a serious high skill work. And an added piece to that is, can you offer just empathy of imagine how that is for the other person who's sharing their deep pain with you. Just imagine it just reflected back, wow, you're going through so much right now. And that is so medicinal, so potent, so powerful. Um, and like I was saying, it's not a skill that is taught to us or that many of us know or have, um, have in our tool belt. So we go into fixes and they go into the bypassing or the, or the cheer me ups. Um, and again, that's all sincere. But what's very helpful for folks is to be witnessed and to be given empathy and just, just to allow that person to fully experience that feeling and know that feelings come and go and eventually it will go. And when we do that, we're trusting the intelligence and the wisdom of that person having that hard time that when they actually fully feel that feeling, they're actually able to move it through to make space for whatever else, you know. Um, so yeah I've gotten a lot of that and I appreciate the intention, but I do notice, and I did notice that there are very few people who can actually just show up in presence what is, especially when it's dark, specially when it's grotesque or cool.

megan febuary:

I love, love, love that you used the word witness because that has been such, such a powerful word for, for me in my healing process and journey. And I think, I think to be a witness of someone's story and pain is probably one of the most sacred acts we can do and really allows us to land with God to be a sacred witness in suffering. Um, I don't think there's a more holy word than the word witness. I love that.

Golden Drake:

It makes me think too that during my treatment journey, um, I was actually surprised at how many, how many folks in my life back down and a few of those folks felt at a certain point safe enough to tell me, dude, it was too much even just to come and sit with me and my house or to communicate with me or whatever. It was like I was such a scary mirror of like, of like the reality that this is a finite realm that we live in and the horrors of illness. Um, and what could potentially happen or, you know, like my embodiment of my cancer experience was triggering or lots of other people in my life. And I even had like one of my dearest friends, one of my best friends had a real moment with me where she was like, girl, like I had to back way up cause I couldn't take it. Like it was too much for me to see you going through this. And, and you know, that's kind of the other side of sharing publicly on social media of the gnarly stuff, not just the highlight reel, which so much of social media is like, Ooh, look at me over here on this cool vacation and this and that. And it's like, I'm like over here, like look at me. I just um, had my breasts removed, you know. And a lot of people were like, dude, I had to unfollow you. Like I had stopped looking, I had to stop looking at your stuff. I have to scroll right by has, it was just too much for me to take. And it's just no judgment on anyone like that. It's just sort of a testimony to the world we live in and how much we hide our down moments and our sicknesses and debt and the darkness. Like we are all, we all kind of collectively seek out looking for the spring. We look for the forever 21 we look for the forever 21 look of youth of, it's like we're in denial of the full life cycle and when someone in our community is going through the Gnarly's and holding up that mirror for us and we have to look away, you know, it's like it's a reflection of our societal values and where the focus of our energy is and it just, it says a lot about who we are as humanity.

megan febuary:

Oh yeah, definitely. All the more reason for people to share, you know, their, their low points, you know, I know some people are like, oh it's so negative or blah blah blah, whatever. But I mean, when we can share, you know our true experiences, the down days, the, the suffering, even though some might not be able to hold that because it is too much of a mirror of, of their fear, right? Or this place of pain that's within them. Um, it might save someone and even if it's just that one person that they needed to know, they weren't alone, it is 100 million times worth it. Like, and so, I mean, that's what I would encourage everyone listening to, just the reminder that, you know, we say this all the time, your voice matters. Your story matters basically on repeat because even the hardest stories are, and actually I think the hardest stories to tell are the most important ones we need to hear. So that's what I mean, that's what drew me to you. You know, like whenever I came across your feed and I don't even know how it came across it. Who knows? You know, but I definitely, that's what, that's what drew me to it because I was longing to see something real. Um, comes like, I'm like a no bullshitter. I like cannot take any bullshit. And when I came across you, I was like, oh, this is someone that is truly landing and an authentic space and inviting us to go to that well and that's just so resonant for me. And um, so just thank you. Thank you for doing that and going to that brave space for all of us.

Golden Drake:

Well thank you. And it makes me think about, you know, the name that you chose for women who roar. And when I think about me in my roaring process, it's been a very muted roar. It's, there's a roar in there, but it was so contorted and stifled by my life experiences and by the society in which I was born, into and raised. Um, and it took nearly losing my life to unhinge the roar. And so, you know, like I think about, I love the name because there is a woman wound and there is a, which was, and for how many thousands of years have we been silenced by death and torture and slavery and abuse. Um, it hasn't been safe to roar since the dawn of Patriarchy for female bodied people. And we have incarnated into this really special time on the planet where women are like, fuck that. You know, like, no, no, no. Well we are putting our foot down and we're opening our, our mouths and we're screaming it from every cell in our feed now. And, and the thing is, it's like, it's still isn't really safe for us to do that. It's very risky to do that in this society still. But the beauty of these media platforms and the Internet, because that's such a double edged sword. But yeah, like you and me, we connected on Instagram and, and it was like, wow, here's this other person in her female body that is finding her way to roar. And then as I go through the pages of your magazine and just like wow, like it, the depth of what is in here and, and the level of vulnerability and authenticity in such a risky society paradigm, anybody takes serious courage to first of all identify that there is a roar within and then access it and let it out. Just solo like on your own and then share a couple of people who you feel safe with. And then, I mean the full blast is like throughout the multiverse, right? And when you put it online or if you printed in a magazine, you're seeding that into the world. And so when women, female bodied people tap into their roar and they're embodying it and then living it, it's like once you're tapping into it and you're accessing it through roar, it doesn't even have to be a sound that comes out. It comes out of your being just walking upon the planet. It's like there it is, you know? And I think it's also a testimony to the art and the way that our creations or creativity or art is also a roar on society, really teaches us to doll that out and not access that and be so preoccupied with being scrapping on survival mode and competing with each other and focused on all the, um, all the other things except for our unique vibrational imprint, palm, the universe. Like that's the roar and we're taught not to. So, um, I'm just really honored and excited and proud to be in your collection of people who are choosing to say fuck it and do it at, at, at dangerous costs. So thank you.

megan febuary:

Thank you for saying that. And you know, I'm not someone that, you know, cries easily or is able to access, um, tears, but I have them right now and I think, um, you know, what you're saying is really the pulse of why I began this movement in this platform. And you know, the name for women who roar was born from a poem my wrote, uh, about year and a half, two years ago. And it says, "I know it scares you to see me get angry, to scream and rage and lose my mind. But I've been silent most of my life, voice muffled and whispering. So now I'm yelling. Every chance I get to make up for the silence, like a lion let loose from her cage roaring and free." And um, so when you, you know, were sharing about this, uh, I was reminded that when I wrote that poem, it was in a season, you know, I think I had just gotten in an argument with someone and let my voice out, let my voice rise. And immediately in response to my anger felt ashamed for having had a voice and having had anger and I was so angry about having to be ashamed about having anger, right. As a woman, I was so pissed and uh, was so dabbling with that question of like, what, what the hell is going on that I have to feel like I, I have to apologize and mute my feelings and my rage in my experience. I'm so done with that. And so that poem was born from that. And, it was only seven months ago that I pictured I had that poem in my mind and it just kept coming up and I thought, you know, this, this has to be more than me, this word, this title, this poem has to be about more than my experience in my existence. This has to be for everyone. when I began to envision that, that's when I began to see kind of a multitude, uh, and uh, people that would be able to get behind it. And, my passion was to host safe spaces for women to share their experiences and their story and their rage and their sadness and their hope. And I didn't picture it being, um, as resonant as it is. And, um, I didn't know exactly what it would look on and I still don't quite know. I have a lot of visions for it. But what I love, love, love about it is that it has just become a place to kind of pass the mic off to women. And say, okay, what are you feeling? How, you know, what's your story or what does voice mean to you? Or how have you felt powerless or what has given you power? Right. And the responses and engagement and excitement behind it literally just pumps me up like every day. And I'm so thrilled to be able to support voices. Um, and you know, it's been something that I've been doing ever since. I was little, like, I don't know if you know this, but my, when I was like 12 years old, I wrote my first book and it was like really small. But, um, it was, it was basically gathering the stories of um, girls and friends that I was in school with in middle school. So super young and I was in a really dark season struggling just to survive with my depression and anxiety that I couldn't name. And all my friends at that time were also just holding so much pain and heartache and struggling with suicide and abuse and all these things. And Anyway, I began to document their stories for them and collected their stories, wrote them out on my dad's old typewriter and then printed them out and stapled, stapled them all together and called it. Um, I think it was like The Truth We dare To Tell.. Really obvious haha. Yeah. I still have it. I'll have to take a picture of it and tag it for you. Um, it's great. But it's funny because it began at age 12. I feel like for women who roar began when I was 12 years old, maybe even before then and ever since them then to some degree I feel like I've been trying to create this platform and I just didn't know what it was or what it would be. And now it's here and it's, I don't know, blowing my mind every day. So, um, so it's really exciting to hear about your experience of it and to hear how the stories you've been reading, um, by women has encouraged you too. And I'm not surprised. I'm not surprised. It's, it's really empowering.

Golden Drake:

Um, yeah. That's so beautiful. Yeah. I mean, we've been needing our communal safe spaces, our whole lines and for how many lifetimes and how many generations of foremothers and our families have had to bear it all alone. You know? And you know, even back in the day it was like, like our grandmothers probably had to just be stoic and save face and not even talk about real stuff with their best friends. And it's just like, it's, it's been stifled for, for literally thousands of years with patriarchy. And um, it's, it's just, it's time. It's been time, it's been so overdue. And so gathering communally is what we do best and there is strength in numbers. And so in all the small ways that people who are terrified to access their authenticity, like it's the baby steps for people that are listening to this. Like I get a lot of people who write to me and they're like, dude, if I could just have your courage, and I'm like, listen, I'm the biggest frady cat ever walk the planet. And, and the courage is actually it, it's in you, it's there. You just got to access it. And sometimes because it's such an unsafe world we live in, um, we, we see it in the millions of ways that it's like find ways to make your baby steps in your access points to figure out what your roar is, your, you roared authenticity, your roar of uniqueness and truth and find ways to express it and embody it that feel safe and that feeds, it's like, it's like pouring gas, leaning your fire of your heart and you know, pretty scene you have, you went from a tiny little spark to this like raging bonfire and you start to give less fucks about how it's received in the world and, and you start to madness magnetizing people who appreciate it, life morphs around them. The embodiment of our truth. Um, so I know it sounds risky for so many people, but it's so fulfilling and in like once you start taking the steps, you never want to go back and you appreciate that you hid in the dark for so long and you understand why. And there's no shaming or blaming or judgment around why you used to do things one way. And why you can no longer do it that way and why you're changing and morphing and growing. And like there's just such an appreciation for all the phases and seasons of the awakening and the empowerment and the liberation process. And like I just, I think about my own life and I'm like, of course I had to come to this planet and be like so disconnected.I had to fully embody that experience so that I could save her the deliciousness of self love and awakening.

megan febuary:

what would you say to women who are listening to this right now and are struggling with? Well, I don't, I don't really have a story to tell or, well, my story isn't as important as Golden's. I just, I don't have anything to say. What, what would you say to them?

Golden Drake:

Yeah, well we tell stories in a million different ways and like I was saying, a roar doesn't even have to have a sound that's coming out of your body and your thing is like, yeah, a lot of people are like, why am I even here? Like, what's the point of life? And you know, it's like there's this overarching sort of muted, dull gray depressive energy and it's like, I'm nothing, you know, I'm like, I'm no big deal. I would venture to say that those folks are sort of on the precipice of diving into their awakening process. And um, the thing is this, like if you're in a body right now, you need to know that you are a multitude of mindblowing miracles converging just for you to simply be in a body and take breaths right now. Like if you're not mind blown over the fact that you're actually in a body right now, and that's an invitation for you to do a little bit of contemplation and, and breathe in and out of the experience of simply be mean. There's no one else on the planet with what 7 billion people on this planet in this moment. There is no one else like you. You're the only one that looks and acts and thinks the way that you do. you're this unique emanation of infinite consciousness in your body temple. And I'm guessing that those people might not be aware of the fact that their body is this sacred temple, a sensing device, materialized form of expression for their unique self. And so you're feeling like you don't really have anything that makes you special amongst the billions of people on the planet. I really think that that's the call to take the inward journey of like really, truly, who am I and why did I choose to incarnate in this body? And like what do I have to express who, who am I at the depth and core that is in penetrated, not penetrated by the imprints of society and culture and expectation and etiquette and the whole gamut. It's like go in and figure out who you truly are and there will be a treasure trove of unique gifts that you will find that you already have existing within you. It's just a matter of you actually seeing them and then, along with that, when the awakening process starts, unconditional self love is woven into that and then there is this desire to be in it. You just, you realize you are being mean it, you are beaming it in all moments. And so it's like when we start the awakening process and we start the revealing of the truth of who we truly are to ourselves, we are the embodiment of that and it carries into every little thing you do and that is the roar is, is figuring out who you actually are and being that and loving that.

megan febuary:

I love that. I say that all the time, that the roar doesn't have to be about a literal noise. Your roar can be you waking up today, even when you felt like you couldn't, your roar today could be, you know, calling someone that you've avoided facing a fear, right? Your roar could, I don't know, be forgiving yourself for something that you've held onto for a long time, you know, or forgiving another, right. It doesn't have to be a literal sound. I think we get really confined by something so obvious. And yet your roar is experiecing this body.

Golden Drake:

That is the roar.

megan febuary:

That is the roar. So good. So good. Oh Man, I love it. Okay. My friend, I'm gonna wrap this up. Um, and you honestly might have already answered this last question that I wanted to ask you with what you just said, but I'm going to go ahead and throw it out for you anyway. Um, if there was one thing you could tell women today, what would you want them to know? Well, I mean the first words that come might sound cliche, but that saying that you are, that which you seek in the world, um, you are, that you are the love that you have longed for your whole life. It actually is the true essence of you and that you are enough. You are valuable. You are sacred. You are holy. You are God. Infinite supreme source, great mystery, Spirit Goddess. Having a finite experience within a body temple. You are on purpose. You are on a sacred mission on planet earth in a time of great upheaval upon this planet. And so if you don't already know what a fucking bad ass you are, I invite you right now to close your eyes and see the truth. Put your arms around your body literally right now. Put your arms around your body and hold and embrace this divine masterpiece, work of art. Work in progress. That is your soul's creation. To have this experience and acknowledge what a mind blowing miracle. Just your simple body temple alone is then realizing that you are the illuminating principle within that body. So the body only animates because your essence is in it. And so for this lifetime, this body, this persona, this name, this ethnic background, this all this nationality, gender, all that, it's, it's your costume for this lifetime and your infinite self will put on this body where this body utilize this body. And then eventually one day you'll drop and release body and you continue to live on eternally. And so embrace the preciousness of this finite experience and the intensity of being in the realm of duality and pleasure and pain. Good, bad, right, wrong, black and white, all of it. And can you hold it all in equanimity? The brilliance of all of it and how every single thing in your life is showing up for you, designed for you by your soul to enhance this journey. So if you're in a dark pit of hell and you're trying to figure out what the fuck you're dealing on the planet, know that this is happening by design on purpose, for you to have your remembering the truth of who you truly are and know that you are so loved and know that you are alive itself.

megan febuary:

Thank you so much, golden. Thank you so much and I appreciate your voice and I thank you for being here and for sharing your roar. Then each one of us,

Golden Drake:

it's my honor.

megan febuary:

thank you so much for tuning into this powerful episode. Go ahead and subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and take a moment to show us some love in the reviews. Share it out with your friends. Let's bring this to the top of the charts. If you believe in the power of story and authentic storytelling, let's kind of raise the awareness and get the voice of for women who are out there. We appreciate you and as always, thank you so much for roaring with us.